I'm ready...

I've prepared for this presentation, I practiced it at home. I know the material. I am ready...

I am standing in front of the classroom, facing the computer that is projecting my presentation onto the board. My classmates eyes whom I've avoided before are suddenly looking directly at me.

I turn on the power point, I open up my notes, I am ready...

The first slide is up, suddenly a feel a flush in my face. I can feel my stomach turning. I begin to think about the girl from last week who fainted during her presentation. What is most likely milliseconds, feels like minutes of silence. I move onto the second slide.

I look at my notes, I look back at the board then the students, finally back at my notes. I take a deep breathe, I am ready...

As I begin to read through the slides my mind goes blank. I try to make up the fact that I am having the biggest brain fart of my life by reading directly from my notes. I can hear my heart in my ears. Looking down at the notes I feel like I have forgotten how to read, the words are all jumbled on the screen. I break down the words just enough to not stutter. I move from slide to slide slowly barely aware of what I am saying. The closer I get to the last slide the more comfortably I breathe.

I've made to the the final slide. I answer my

classmates questions and take a seat. I can finally breathe a sigh of relief. After watching the rest of my classmates presentations, I think back to mine "....well, that wasn't so bad."

Leading up to this moment, my mind was trying to convince me that I was ready. It wasn't my first experience with public speaking but it was my first time feeling this overwhelming anxiety. I'll never truly know what made me so nervous, but I still think about this day. As powerful as all those feelings were, I know I would do it again... and I have. That's not to say that public speaking is my forte, but at least I know I am not afraid.